Monday, July 24, 2017

Horatio Slice: Guitar Slayer of the Universe by Oleander Plume


Title:  Horatio Slice: Guitar Slayer of the Universe
Author: Oleander Plume
Publisher: Go Deeper Press
Release Date: 7/24/2017
Heat Level: 5 - Erotica
Pairing: Male/Male, Male/Male Menage
Length: 400
Genre: Erotica, Fantasy, Science Fiction, Humor

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Synopsis

Horatio Slice is NOT dead. Gunner Wilkes knows a secret. Heartthrob rock star Horatio Slice is not dead. Sure, Gunner may turn heads with his big brain, good looks, and gym-built body, but his mind is on one thing only: returning his all-time favorite rocker and secret fanboy crush to Earth. Yes, there are VAMPIRE PIRATES Fame and stardom were starting to wear thin for Horatio Slice, but when he was sucked through a magical portal while on stage at Madison Square Garden into a jail cell in a strange dimension called Merona, his confusion quickly cleared upon meeting his sexy, dark-haired cellmate, a vampire pirate named Snake Vinter, who filled Horatio in about life in the universe, jumping from dimension to dimension, and craftily avoiding the wrath of gnarly-mask-wearing leather queen King Meridian—a guy nobody wants to cross. The metal ship is named Frances. And on Snake’s metal ship live eight identical blond Humerians, who proudly display their cocks and assholes in carefully crafted trousers, as well as a wild assortment of untamable, cock-hungry travelers and stowaways. But someone has hacked into Frances’ mainframe, demanding that Snake and crew deliver Horatio Slice to King Meridian, or feel his wrath. All the zany magical comedy of Mel Brooks, an adventure not dissimilar to Indiana Jones meets Barbarella, and men, men, horny men, of all shapes and sizes, Horatio Slice, Guitar Slayer of the Universe is wild, fun, pornographic fiction for anyone who loves the masculine, the feminine, and all identities in between. Even more so, it’s for cravers—for aficionados—of big, hard, pounding cock, and anyone who can handle laughs that won't stop coming.

Excerpt

Gunner raced to the machine and squatted in front of the laptop, hands trembling as he typed in an eight-digit password. A red box popped up this time with the words, Open the portal? Y or N. In four more minutes, he would tap the Y key again and hope to hell his invention worked. He willed the clock to move faster while his fingers twitched in eagerness. At 10:24, Gunner pressed Y, and the room exploded with light and sound. “Holy fucking shit!” He dove behind the ramshackle fortress head first, as if sliding into home base, wincing when his elbow scraped the rug. He scrambled to his knees and poked his head over the top of the couch, barely comprehending the chaos taking place around him. First, the air sizzled and turned blue. Loud vibrations caused every object in the room to quake. The clamor grew louder and louder until it evolved into a thunderous crack that reverberated through his spinal column. Gunner bit down on a knuckle to stifle his screams of terror when a shimmering circle of light appeared in the ceiling. Right before his eyes, a figure emerged from the portal. Two bare feet, followed by two bare legs, a pair of balls, and a cock—a gigantic, hard cock. “It’s actually working,” Gunner mumbled around the knuckle still wedged between his teeth, “but where the hell are his clothes?” Choosing to stay behind the bunker, Gunner rose higher on his knees to get a better view as the rest of Horatio Slice appeared—intact and alive. Once the top of his head cleared the portal, the circle winked out, leaving a ring of what appeared to be soot behind. “Ow!” Horatio said as he hit the mattress. He sat up and rubbed his neck. “That hurt like a motherfucker.” And just like that, Horatio Slice was back—stark naked and kind of pissed off. Gunner almost lost control of his bladder as he watched the hunk rise to full height. The man was a glorious six-and-a-half-feet of chiseled muscle and masculine bravado. A seductive snake tattoo wound over one calf, while another circled his right bicep. Horatio brushed his long, brunette hair out of his eyes and looked around. “Where the hell am I?” he asked. “Earth,” Gunner said. “New York State, to be exact.” He couldn’t take his eyes off Horatio’s cock. The rumors were true. Horatio Slice sported a behemoth between his legs, a fully erect behemoth dripping copious amounts of pre-come. Gunner wondered what Horatio was up to before he fell through the portal. “No shit? I’m back home,” Horatio said. “Sweet!” “You’re welcome.” “Who said that?” Horatio turned toward Gunner. “Me. I’m a big fan. Really big. I can’t believe you’re here.” Gunner took a breath. “I can’t believe you’re alive.” “Of course, I’m alive.” Horatio stepped over a bundle of wires, crossing the six feet that separated him from Gunner in two, long strides. Smiling, he leaned over the bunker and peered down at Gunner, who shrunk back in shock. Was the guy checking him out? “Hello, hottie,” Horatio said, his smile deepening into more of a leer. While he’d imagined his idol’s homecoming many times, none of those fantasies included Horatio being naked or staring at him with a throbbing erection and a predatory glint in his eyes. He practically melted under Horatio’s piercing blue gaze. “Um, hi,” Gunner said as he crawled out on his hands and knees from behind the sofa. “You made one hell of an entrance.” “The impact almost shattered my spine,” Horatio said, “but I think I’m okay.” Gunner took the hand Horatio offered and let the man hoist him to his feet. Instead of flip-floppy, Horatio’s touch turned Gunner’s stomach into an over-inflated basketball that thumped against his ribs. The ball bounced faster when he noticed Horatio eyeballing his crotch. Still holding Gunner’s hand, Horatio pulled him closer and stared into his eyes. “You don’t work for Meridian, do you?”

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Meet the Author

Oleander Plume lives in Chicago, Illinois, with her husband, two daughters and a pair of obnoxious cats. While she writes in many genres, her favorite is m/m. Or m/m/m. Or m/m/m/m, or … who’s counting, anyway? Horatio Slice: Guitar Slayer of the Universe (published by Go Deeper Press) is Oleander’s first, full-length novel, but her short stories have appeared in anthologies by Violet Blue, Rachel Kramer Bussel, Shane Allison, Alison Tyler, Neil Plakcy, and F. Leonora Solomon. Oleander also edited a self-published erotic anthology, titled Chemical [se]X, featuring stories centered around the theme of aphrodisiac chocolates. For more information, please visit her at poisonpendirtymind.com.  

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